The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Randomize
