Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize