her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize
