people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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