she peed on how many people?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
