ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
