Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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