More tranny stories later!
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
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