DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
