..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Randomize
