Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
