I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
