Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Randomize