Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
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