5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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