im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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