Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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