I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
This is my gift to your gina
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
