It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
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