Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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