Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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