But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
