You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize