Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize