Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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