Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
