I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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