I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize