Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
