I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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