She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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