I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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