It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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