U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Someone shattered a urinal.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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