Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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