So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
