Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
God, I missed his penis.
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