He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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