Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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