no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
