He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize