I need help removing her.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
