I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
