He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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