I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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