And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
