Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
