I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize