if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
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