new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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