I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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